The P.A.S.T.E.Y. AWARD (v.3.0)

Posted by Matt on Wednesday, November 11th, 2009

Or…Tyler Hansbrough’s Energetic, Pale-Ass, Scrappy, Tough, Eager Youngster AWARD

hansbrough2

Would love a porch swing.

Background: Certain athletes get so much recognition that this recognition deserves additional recognition.  But we’re not talking about just any kind of recognition. We’re talking about a special breed of athlete that receives constant accolades from the public, though these accolades usually have nothing to do with actual ability. Thus, this award is named after the former UNC hoops star (and current “lost dog finder”) who epitomizes the spirit, speed, and skin-tone of this particular type of athlete.

Ladies and Gentlemen, PASTEY III goes to:  LUKE HARANGODY

Notre+Dame+v+Louisville+-Qu_l2XAfTFl

That loose ball is all mine, homey!

2009′s Pre-Season college basketball player of the year has NBA Draft Second Round aficionados drooling.  Harangody is a below-the-rim power forward who led the Fightin’ Irish to a spectacular NIT bid in 2008-09.  The press rewarded Harangody’s gritty leadership of one of last year’s top-96 teams with the premier individual honor of this pre-season.

There’s no doubt his Unitas-esque haircut and red-face helped Luke garner this honor.

Like Hansbrough before him, the faithful fans of Harangody’s team can’t get enough of him.  His fire, passion, and 10-inch vertical thrill Notre Dame fans and ESPN announcers of all types.  The guys may not all want to be him, but the St.Mary’s girls certainly want to sleep with him sans contraception.

Not surprisingly, Notre Dame’s roster is heavy with PASTEY competition.  Most notably, Mississippi State transfer Ben Hansbrough (Tyler’s Brother) will look to get out-PASTEY’ed as the season moves forward.  But on this day, GW is only honoring the under-sized PF with mettle, gritty toughness and librarian-like athleticism.  Luke Harangody: Congrats!

Whiteness:  Blanched, with a tinge of post-game “Santa Cheeks.”

Nicknames:  Gody, G.T. (Gym Teacher)

Quote:  ”The pro guys are wrong. Harangody hasn’t just been a good college player the last three years. He has been an absolutely dominant force while playing for mediocre teams in what is by far the toughest conference in the country.”  Seth Davis, Sports Illustrated.


2 Responses to The P.A.S.T.E.Y. AWARD (v.3.0)

  1. Kevin says:

    This may seem ambitious, but a live (or even tape-delayed?) awards show for 5.0 might be in order.

  2. Matt says:

    good idea. I’ll see if I can get a 3-camera team on this.

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